Funishment Friday
It probably won't come as a surprise that I'm much kinkier than my nesting partner, Honey Bunch. She blows my mind when it comes to vanilla sex and really she's interested in pleasing me, but we run into two major problems when it comes to kink- she's far more comfortable being a domme BUT she's uncomfortable introducing new games and dynamics because they aren't really in her wheelhouse. I also contribute to the problem by often getting stuck in submissive shyness. But kink is really important to me, so I've been determined to find a solution. Luckily, right as I was looking for tools to help us through this mismatch, Funishment arrived in the mail and solved my problem!
Funishment is a BDSM card game with 170 prompt cards focused on kinky communication. It's a great way to discover what you and your pals like and I'm properly obsessed with this game. Here's a quick rundown of how it works, and what happened when I played with Honey Bunch:
Choose Roles:
You initially decide if you want to play as set roles or switches. If you're playing as switches you alternate between sub and dom each turn. At first Honey Bunch wanted to play in our set roles, but I was interested in playing as switches. Honestly, my bratty side yearns to dominate her because she's so difficult to top. We decided that I would be the sub two turns in a row and she would be the sub once subsequently. Again, I don't like following rules so I had to immediately improvise. But after getting the hang of it, we started playing more quickly, and switching every turn made way more sense. We were both incredibly uncomfortable when we were in our opposite roles which made it that much funnier. If you can't laugh at yourself, what's the point?!
Consent Cards:
What's awesome about Funishment is that it's heavily focused on consent. No one does anything that makes them feel uncomfortable. It should be obvious that BDSM only works when everyone is enthusiastically participating, but it's unfortunately common for folks (especially kinky newbies) to minimize the importance of consent. Funishment starts off with one person reading a prompt card and then each player flipping a consent card. If everyone flips "yes" then the card is played. If anyone flips a "maybe" it goes into a separate pile which can be played later in the game. If anyone flips a "no" card then it's immediately discarded. Honey Bunch and I were pretty game to try things out, but I had to flip a "no" card when I was prompted to fake an orgasm. My cheeks immediately got red, and it brought up a lot of bad memories of feeling obligated to fake it with male partners who didn't care about my pleasure. The card went back into the discard pile and we moved on. Honey Bunch decided that she didn't feel super comfortable masturbating at the start of the game, so we didn't do that either. Again, playtime is only fun when everyone is doing what makes them feel comfortable. It’s totally ok to say “maybe” or “no”. This isn’t a competition, and everyone is entitled to their preferences. I flipped a hard “yes” when I got a card prompting me to be a pony. Honey Bunch even fed me Smarties for being such a good horsey, after spanking me with a crop, of course!
Prompt Cards:
The 170 prompt cards are divided into a few categories: commands, punishments, inquisitions, meta cards, and x-rated cards. When you play as switches, whoever reads the card is dominant. Command cards require the domme to make the submissive do things. I read a card making Honey Bunch paint my nails. I thought I would hate this because the last butch who painted my nails DABBED the paint on. DABBED! The fucking nerve. But Honey Bunch is the perfect femme butch and did a stellar job painting my left hand burnt orange. I didn't know I liked this kind of service, turns out I find it super hot. She got a command card which forced me to make the bed. She used a crop to spank my butt because I was too slow and didn't make good corners. We were giggling and having a blast by that time. A punishment card gives dommes permission to reprimand the sub. I rolled a dice determining how many times she would hit me with a riding crop. I rolled a six, obviously! The inquisition cards are questions meant to help you better understand your partner. She had to tell me about her first kiss, her lady camp counselor when she was a teen, wow! Meta cards apply to the whole gameplay, I had to call her "Your Highness" for the duration of the game, or get spanked. My bratty side wanted to disobey, but I did my best. X-rated cards are pretty self-explanatory. You can play with or without them depending on your comfort level.
Honey Bunch and I had a blast playing Funishment. We played a few dozen cards the first time until she out-bratted me! I drew a card as domme making her kneel on rice, but Your Highness complained about having to get her own rice and having to clean it up. The fucking nerve! Clearly, I need to do a better job being dominant, I'm practicing. We've decided to make it our Friday ritual.
Funishment is currently just a Kickstarter, and they need help pushing their campaign to the end. I want this game to be available for everyone, so go check them out so you can get your own set! I love these folks and I'm stoked for them to make expansion packs. Here's where you can find more.
I hope we got your juices flowing. As always, we aim to provide as much free and accessible content as possible; thanks to the amazing support of our patrons. If you want to help us keep the orgasms flowing, head over to our Patreon to support our work and get access to bonus content! And follow Queer Pleasure by Shrimp Teeth wherever you listen to podcasts so you don’t miss an episode.