The Adult Industry Owes Lesbians An Apology

Context: I was asked to write an op-ed piece for the adult industry source, XBIZ. The prompt was: to write something that positions you as an expert in your niche. Great! Here’s my *expert* consumer psychologist observation on the way the adult industry has treated lesbians (and the entire LGBTQIA+ community) and what it would take to rebuild trust. Below is the submission that will never otherwise see the light of day.

 

Rebuilding trust with Lesbians

How the adult industry must come to terms with its objectification of a growing consumer segment  

The adult industry is currently facing an interesting dilemma: how can it reconcile the past objectification of the lesbian community and repair trust to appeal to this growing consumer segment? Listen, it’s no secret that the adult industry has not been great in its depiction of women loving women. While “Girl On Girl" is the most popular category on mainstream porn sites, real lesbians have largely been overlooked. A weird dichotomy emerges where lesbian sex is coopted and framed within the context of male sexuality, after all, that’s the target audience the adult industry has served up to this point. Real lesbians are portrayed as “frigid man-hating dykes”, who can’t possibly have satisfying sex in the absence of a man. Mainstream lesbian porn, by contrast, is almost exclusively created by and for straight men, using straight cisgender femme performers. I’m sure you’re familiar with the “bouncy plastic blonde” versions of lesbian porn. You’ve also probably guessed correctly that that representation is inaccurate. Fetishization has, understandably, sent the message to real lesbians that they are not welcome in the adult industry. Let’s talk about the glaring missed opportunity: lesbians have AMAZING sex, lots of it, and want to purchase adult goods and watch queer porn that accurately depicts sex acts!

A Growing Presence  

There’s a cultural shift happening. The LGBTQIA+ community is becoming more visible and vocal. Pink Money, otherwise known as the buying power of the queer community, accounts for a whopping $4.6 trillion dollars; making it the fourth largest global GDP. With the decriminalization of gay relationships and the legalization of marriage emerging around the world, the queer community can no longer be overlooked as a “niche” audience. Previous estimates put the LGBTQIA+ community around 5% of the global population, but as acceptance grows, more folks feel able to come out and new estimates show that number is closer to 10%. My guess is the estimates are still radically low. Major companies in every industry have started creating campaigns, usually during June to celebrate Pride month, that uplift the voices of the community. Even so, the adult industry still lags behind in its acceptance of the community.   

It’s important to note that backlash has sprung up against “rainbow capitalism”. Companies like Target, Nike, and Colgate-Palmolive have all faced heat for creating false allyship to drive profit. The community has pushed back against major brands that have previously inflicted harm through discriminatory practices and distorted representation. Many people claim that “rainbow capitalism” is just a way for companies to coop the movement, make quick sales, and then retract their support for the other eleven months of the year. Cheap advertising tactics that simply pay lip service to the cause continue to backfire. Lesbians opt to support smaller brands that have a track record of creating safety for the community, elevating authentic voices, and showing support beyond pride month. 

Understanding the rise of the lesbian audience        

The coupling of the sex-positive movement, female empowerment, and queer visibility has suddenly made lesbians a strong viable consumer demographic in the adult industry as well. In yesteryears, lesbian sexuality was left shrouded in mystery. Today, lesbian sex educators around the world are becoming vocal in advocating for an accurate representation of Gay-Girl pleasure. Sex toys are no longer the hidden secret kept in bedside drawers. Pornography is no longer only for men. More and more queer women are celebrating and openly discussing their use of toys, porn, and other adult products. Unfortunately, many queer women still don’t know which companies to turn to when trying to buy such goods. Many report their dismay when trying to buy everyday products like dental dams, PH balanced lubes, comfortable harnesses, and real lesbian porn. There’s a growing need for these products and relatively little mainstream access. If you’re not living in a large city with a small female-owned and run sex toy shop, for the most part, you’re out of luck. The need is there; the question becomes, who will pioneer lesbian PornHub, lesbian Trojan, and lesbian Doc Johnson?          

The need for safety among queers    

There’s an obvious distrust from queer women of the adult industry. Many have voiced dismay if not outright disgust for the way lesbians have been simultaneously exploited and excluded. Historically, small and independently owned feminist adult stores have been the only places that have felt safe to buy intimate products for queer women. But as visibility grows and shame around lesbian sexuality decreases, larger brands must reconcile with previous wrongdoing if they hope to gain trust from this segment. Companies that have openly engaged with lesbian consumers, created thoughtful products that amplify pleasure, and inclusive advertising have thrived. However, brands who’ve attempted to sell the same version of distorted male-dominated faux-lesbian sexuality have been quickly rejected. As a demographic, feeling safe to engage in their sexuality is of paramount importance. From brands, that sense of security can only be fostered with full transparency and accountability. Rejecting the old model of objectification that’s been rampant in the adult industry is the first step toward gaining support and trust. Creating authenticity for queers in the adult industry. Beyond trust, lesbians want brands that cater to them authentically. Brands that understand the unique sexual perspective of queer women and go out of their way to create culturally relevant products and advertising. It’s not enough for straight marketing executives to come up with campaigns that aim to simplify the queer experience and package it in rainbows during June. Companies that have been the most successful have hired queer women to run marketing that reflect the lived experiences of lesbians and speak to legitimacy.     

More and more, sex toy companies that feature real queer women are gaining traction in an industry that’s been male-dominated. Small brands are amending the hurt caused by the overall industry. As the voice of the LGBTQIA+ community continues to grow, the model of authenticity and security will continue to pave the way in appealing to a segment that’s been unfortunately overlooked.

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